Under the Mountain Stars

The truck and horse trailer veered towards the sickening drop-off beside the highway. Lenora pumped the brake pedal hard and checked her side-view mirror… sure enough, a blown trailer tire. With her heart hammering in her chest and a cold coil of fear in her stomach, she slowed the truck and horse trailer further and eased onto the highway shoulder. Turning on the hazard lights, she stepped out into the sharp wind and walked back to assess the damage. The tire was flat and beginning to shred. The thin mountain air and the reality of her predicament made her feel lightheaded.

She took three deep breaths. A flat tire is really nothing more than a good challenge, she tried to remind herself.

Opening the trailer door, she was greeted by a low nicker. Major, her Arabian horse, was eating hay, his dark eyes large with concern.

“We have a flat tire, my boy. I guess I better see if I can change this darn thing,” Lenora said.

The realization that she was all alone on a mountain highway, thousands of miles from her old home, with her horse and a flat tire was really setting in. She took three more breaths and twisted her chestnut hair into a quick braid. After rummaging around in her emergency road kit, she found the right size socket for the trailer lug nut and a long breaker bar. Thankfully, she had a trailer jack. She set it in front of the good tire, then got back into her truck and slowly pulled the trailer forward. Only then did she remember that the lug nuts on the tire had to be loosened first. Choking back a laugh and then the tears stinging her eyelids, she backed the trailer off the jack. She then loosened the lug nuts, pulled the trailer back on the jack and removed the tire. Her spare was ready. She managed to lift it onto the exposed bolts and began the process of tightening the nuts. She wiped a stray curl out of her eyes with the back of one hand.

Fifteen minutes later she was leaning against the trailer with four good tires. She tried to wipe her hands off on some damp grass along the road. The action seemed pointless but made her feel like she was somewhat cleaner. She then stepped back into the horse trailer to check on Major one more time. Burying her face in his white mane, she let a couple of breathy sobs escape her wind-chapped lips before straightening up; it was time to drive again.

Lenora thought herself lucky to have had the flat tire before the sun disappeared behind the distant mountains. A contented smile crept to the corners of her lips. She did feel pretty proud of herself for changing the flat.

The mountain highway was steadily climbing, and the truck downshifted once again. To her left a huge vista opened up, and her heart soared; this was her grand adventure, one she knew she desperately needed. It had taken nearly a year of watching the last of her life fall to pieces around her to come to such a realization. Her marriage had ended, and her mother’s death had become reality, before she accepted her aunt and uncle’s offer to move to their ranch in the mountains.

Two hours outside of Missoula, Lenora saw the sign for the ranch up ahead and turned on the blinker. The dirt road was a rich red color. She looked through the pines but could not see a building, just fence stretching away into hills. Her heart began to sing. Something here felt good, yet oh-so-wild. A river edged the meadow full of sagebrush to the southeast, and the mountains reached down to cradle the land on three sides, creating a bowl full of meadows and hills. She found herself pressing the accelerator with vigor, making truck and trailer bounce along the rutted road. A mix of wonder, excitement, and anticipation stirred her stomach in a way that she had not experienced in a very long time.

As the truck crested a rise, Lenora saw the ranch spread out before her. The barn roofs looked as if they needed replacing. The place was not huge, but she found herself in love with it already. It was a little smaller than she remembered from her one visit as a child but just as beautiful. The truck eased down the slope to the ranch and then up the rise to the barns. Lenora turned off the engine and climbed out feeling stiff and suddenly very tired. The door to the ranch house swung open, and two dogs followed her aunt out onto the big spread of porch. Aunt Annie’s copper hair caught the setting sun to the west, and her smile instantly welcomed Lenora.

“You made it! How was the drive? I wish you would have just had that horse shipped. But I understand of course,” Annie said in one breath. “I’ve just worried so much about you driving alone. All those long, long miles and all.”

She opened her arms and hugged Lenora. The thin air, the long drive, feeling safe for the first time since her mother’s death; suddenly tears were a blink away. The dogs stood around wagging their tails. Annie let Lenora go but kept her hand resting on her niece’s shoulder.

Lenora looked around at the simple, log ranch house and the large barns. There was a corral to Lenora’s left, and she could see cattle to the west grazing in the setting sun. Beyond the cows were mountains and hills, huge rolling slopes followed by steep peaks. The sheer beauty of the place seemed overwhelming to Lenora. From the corner of her eye, she could see her aunt watching her.

“What do you think?” Annie asked.

“It’s beautiful,” Lenora replied.

“Hey! You made it,” Uncle Byron called, as he appeared around the side of one of the barns.

He was a tall man with wide shoulders and a bit of stomach. His gray mustache would have looked ridiculous back in Chicago, but seemed perfect paired with the ranch and setting sun. He smiled and reached out to grasp Lenora’s other shoulder.

“Welcome to Bear Dance Ranch. We’re so glad you’re here. We really are,” he said. “Now, let’s get this fancy horse of yours unloaded. What did you say he is, an Arabian?”

Lenora nodded.

“Hmm, well I guess we better have a look at him,” Byron said.

Lenora unlatched the trailer clasp, and her uncle opened the back door of the horse trailer. Major stepped out and snorted as he arched his beautiful neck. His glossy coat caught the dying sun and he tossed his head. Lenora could not help but smile, Major was always one to show off.

“Well, he sure is something,” Her uncle said.

“He’s a good-looking animal. Nice conformation, and heart, it looks like, too,” said a man’s voice coming from just behind the small group.

Lenora turned and found herself staring at the man. She politely looked down as she felt her neck and cheeks heat with embarrassment.

“Lenora, this is Clay Darkhorse,” Annie said with a smile. “He’s the ranch foreman your uncle told you about. He’s helped us here at the ranch for a long time now. He’s also quite the horse trainer, you know.”

Lenora did remember her uncle saying something about a ranch foreman, or a “right-hand man,” as he put it, but for some reason she had pictured an aging white man sitting around talking about the good old days with her aunt and uncle. Instead, the man that stood in front of her was dark-skinned, dressed in snug, worn jeans with a little mud in his black hair and eyes that made her feel like she was standing in front of him in lingerie. Man, those eyes, she thought.

She knew she had better not look directly at him. A little late, she realized he was talking to her.

“I hope the drive was good,” he said, looking expectantly at her with a half-smile slowly appearing on his lips.

The top button was undone on Clay’s shirt, and she could just make out the definition of his chest, beautifully shaped by years of ranch work, she imagined. He stood with a relaxed grace, his hands open and palms facing towards her. She wondered if he was Lakota, perhaps from a local tribe. She wanted to ask but instead opted to answer his question.

“Yes. Fine. Really long though,” Lenora said. “I had a flat on Ninety-three, but I got it changed okay.”

She held up her still-blackened hands from the tire as evidence. At that moment, her hair took full advantage of an opportunity to make a dramatic appearance and broke loose of the rubber band that had previously held it captive, falling around her face and halfway down her back.

She could think of nothing else to say except ‘you’re gorgeous’ so she remained quiet, trying her best to smooth her hair away from her face with her less-than-clean hands. She could only imagine what she must look like after her long drive and tire-changing episode.

“What? A flat tire? I told you she shouldn’t have driven all that way,” Annie scolded.

Lenora was not sure if her aunt was talking to her or her uncle.

“It’s okay, really! I changed it and still made it to the ranch before dark.” Lenora tried to reassure her aunt.

Annie was glaring at Byron. There was an awkward pause.

“Can I get him settled for you?” Clay asked, nodding towards Major.

Was she imagining it, or was he staring at her? She hoped she had not rubbed black dirt onto her face in her attempts to control her own wild mane.

“So, did you change the tire yourself?” Clay asked.

“Yeah. My horse didn’t want to help,” Lenora said. She felt stupid as soon as the words left her mouth. She chided herself silently for always having a snarky reply.

“Good job.” Clay grinned. He let Major sniff his hands before taking the lead rope and walking her horse towards the barn.

“I hate to leave him in a new place, can I come?” Lenora felt her cheeks burn again but did not even know why.

“Yes, of course.” Clay was smiling. “You can go in and get settled, and then I’ll come get you. I’ll show you where your horse is staying, and maybe give you a quick tour of the ranch.”

“Good idea, Clay,” Annie said.

And with that, Clay led Major towards the barn, and Annie, Byron, and Lenora made their way to the house.

The front steps were huge, hand-hewn timbers and the wrap around porch reminded her of the house from Legends of the Fall with its weathered, part-of-the-land feel. The front door led to a large entry with two benches and shelves for boots. A large assortment of coats and jackets for every season hung along the wall. Beyond the entry, a dining room and kitchen merged into one open area with a large fireplace surrounded by heavy chairs and a table. Annie showed Lenora a seemingly new Viking stove and large white farm style sink. Two long windows opened up above a long counter and cutting board, shedding light into the kitchen and giving a breathtaking view of the river fringing the meadows.

“Are you cooking again?” Annie asked.

“How about breakfast in the morning?” Lenora replied.

She felt her body relax as the words left her mouth. Cooking in the mountains sounded just right, she thought.

She would find a new way forward, and it would be good, maybe even wonderful, after some time of course, but for now good would be just fine for her she decided.

Annie led her up the staircase, which was almost as solid as the outside porch. At the top of the landing several doors lined the hallway. Annie led Lenora to the last door, which opened into a large room with both south- and west-facing windows.

“It has a private bath,” Annie said. “I hope it’s okay?”

Her aunt seemed unsure, and so Lenora smiled and touched the other woman’s shoulder. “It’s perfect.”

Lenora walked to the window and gazed out at the last of the sunset. The colors were purple and gray, and the shadows were long. She brushed her fingers across the window frame and felt a deep hollowness. She turned back into the room and saw her aunt watching her.

“How are you holding up?” Annie asked.

“I think better. I’m glad I came. Sometimes, at moments like this, I…” Lenora looked away as a lump made its presence known in her throat, “I find myself thinking about calling her. And telling her about my day. All about my adventures.”

“I’m sorry. I’m so glad you came though. I can’t imagine you all alone in that horrible city. This is your home now, if you want it to be.”

“Thanks, Aunt Annie,” Lenora said.

Byron came through the doorway with two of Lenora’s bags and behind him was a thin guy in his late teens.

“This is Jesse,” Byron said.

The young man smiled shyly at Lenora through his shaggy forelock.

“Get settled in. And then come down. Clay will show you around the place,” Annie said.

Lenora unpacked some of her clothes but realized she was far too tired to try and face sorting through what was left of her old life. Her uncle and Jesse brought up the last of her things. It was funny how she had managed to dwindle her belongings down to a suitcase and a few bags. She laid out a picture of her mother. It had been taken on one of the last fun days they had enjoyed, before the chemo had drained all the vitality from her mother. In the picture, they pressed their cheeks together and posed like best friends for a selfie on Lenora’s phone. She gave the picture a quick kiss before pulling on her jacket.

Out on the porch, the shadows were gray and the light of dusk haunting. She made her way out into the yard and found Clay in the first barn. A dog rubbed against his leg and he stroked its ears as Lenora approached.

“This is Suzie. She’s a good herding dog, but an even better companion,” Clay said. Another dog appeared behind Lenora and sniffed her pant leg in a friendly way.

“That’s Sam,” Clay said. He motioned to the dog who was introducing himself to Lenora.

She touched Sam’s velvet ears with her fingertips and then knelt and stroked his black and white face.

Clay gave Suzie one more pat, nodded to Lenora, and led the way into the barn. Major was eating hay and looked relaxed. He nuzzled Lenora’s hand but then went back to his food.

“He looks happy. Thanks for getting him situated,” Lenora said.

“Sure. I’ll show you the rest of the barns. And then, if you feel up to it, I’ll take you out to see some of the pastures. Tomorrow, though,” Clay said.

“That would be great,” she said, her heart picking up speed.

She wondered if Clay was part of her aunt and uncle’s plan to cheer her up. Surely not. They must need a lot of help on the ranch, and they probably did not want her flirting with the foreman. Also, she got the idea that Clay was more than just an employee to them, maybe like the son they had never had. She knew she had better be careful; her heart could not take any more jostling.

She wished she knew how to properly ask what tribe he was from. After living in the city most of her life, she had little experience with Native Americans. She felt awkward; like a rude, white person. No one ever asked from which European country she originated.

Clay showed her the outdoor pens and several barns. There were pastures with young horses and lots of cows with calves.

“In a month or so we’ll take all these momma cows, as well as their new calves, up to the summer pasture,” Clay said. “We run around one hundred and fifty head of cattle this time of year.”

Lenora had never been around cows. Back east she had worked at a local barn and trained quite a few horses, but this was a whole new world to her. They continued on their tour and stopped next to a long, high-roofed building.

“I’d really like to turn this into an indoor arena. I need a place to train horses in the winter when the weather is bad,” Clay said.

He glanced at her and then looked away quickly. His dark eyebrows framed the most beautiful long-lashed eyes she had ever seen on a man.

“We had better get you inside for dinner,” Clay said.

Lenora realized that she must look tired. Thankfully, he would never know how bad she had looked a month ago. She saw herself vividly, cleaning stalls at the horse barn where Major had been boarded, her unwashed hair knotted in a bun and eyes ringed by dark shadows; sleeping had become more than difficult after her mother’s death. That was in the past, she reminded herself. Today she was touring her new home with a surprisingly handsome guide.

Inside the ranch house a fire was burning in the hearth and the smell of beef stew and cornbread filled the kitchen. Lenora tried to help carry out plates and silverware, but was shooed out of the kitchen by her aunt and uncle. She picked a chair at the large table with a view of the glowing fire and drank the glass of red wine Jesse handed her. Once everyone was seated and food had been passed around, conversation ran to cattle, fence, and pastures. Lenora listened, feeling a little overwhelmed. There was no doubt in her mind she was a good hand with horses, but this whole ranch business was new to her and a lot to take in. She wondered if she would fit in with this close-knit group of people whom she barely knew. She tried to remind herself they were her family.

“The River Meadow will need worked on. I saw at least two places where whole sections of fence have been washed away with the floods from melted snow,” Clay said.

“Jesse, you’d better get started on that in the morning,” Byron said.

“How are those two new mares coming along, Clay?” Annie asked.

“Good. Both are loping well and ready to go out on the range. They haven’t bucked once with me this whole week,” Clay said.

“Clay takes in outside horses for training to help keep this place going,” Annie said.

Lenora nodded because her mouth was full. They were a big family she realized. After being seldom in human company during her long drive west, and even before that, as the shambles of her marriage came to a shuddering halt, she was unused to conversation. Her head felt thick and her mind blank. There would be a great deal to learn starting tomorrow. Hopefully, sleep would help her mind regain some of its quickness. Maybe she would find joy in the company of others, or at least she hoped so.

The feeling of loneliness caught her off guard as she climbed the stairs to her new room after dinner. She told herself this was a new beginning, and no matter what it had to be better than the hell she was leaving behind; an empty life without her mother, a failed job and an ex-husband who already had a serious new girlfriend.

Walking to the windows in her room, she opened one of them. Outside, the air was crisp and alive. She took a deep breath and found herself imagining riding out through the purple hills and into the mountains beyond. She could smell sage grass, cows and maybe a hint of wood smoke. There was something magical about this place, alive with the promise of a fresh start. Deep inside, she was holding an empty place, waiting for life to fill it with new adventures and gifts.