The Feels.
"Khlo!" I heard Parker's voice and I groaned, snuggling into my pillow. Instead of the softness of my my pillow, I was met with a hard surface. I was awake in an instant. I opened my eyes to a smirking Ian.
Holy flying fucks.
I was freaking out. Parker was outside and Ian here. Parker couldn't see me with Ian. I stared at Ian, my heart beating at double speed.
"Get out," I hissed.
Ian raised his eyebrows. "What did you just day kitten?"
"Parker cannot see us together!" I hissed. "Get out!"
"Okay," Ian said, and I was surprised at how easily he agreed. I thought I would have to resort to some type of tactics to make him leave.
"Khloe!" I heard Parker yell again.
"I'm up!" I yelled, and I heard him groan. I looked at the clock, my eyes widening when I saw the time. It was already eight thirty.
Ian got out of bed, pulling on his jeans. He walked to the door, and just as he was about to open the door, I realized what he was up to.
"Stop!" I almost yelled, getting out of bed. It was only when a gush of cold air hit my body, that I realized that I was naked.
Ian turned around and raised an eyebrow at me. That was all it took for him to get inappropriate thoughts running in my head. He looked so darn sexy like that, I wanted to jump on him.
"You asked me to leave, didn't you kitten?" Ian asked, feigning innocence.
"Not through the damn door!" I sighed, exasperated. "Parker is there."
"And how exactly is that my problem, Khloe?" Ian said, his voice dangerously low. I frowned. Horror filled in the pit of my stomach. No. I couldn't let him know. I wouldn't let Parker know about my past. I put it all behind me. I couldn't do it again.
"Wait." I muttered, running into the bathroom, and wrapping a robe around myself. "Can you please hide?" I asked Ian, using my best pleading voice.
"One time," Ian narrowed his eyes at me, walking into the bathroom.
I opened the door to an annoyed Parker. Actually, even annoyed didn't cover his expressions right now. He looked furious.
"We are going to be so fûcking late!" Ian exclaimed.
I managed a weak smile. "I don't think I will be able to come. I think I'm coming down with a fever."
Parker's face instantly softened. "Do you want me to take you to the doctor? Do you want me to get you breakfast?"
I shook my head, guilt filling me. Here I was, lying to him, for a bloody stupid reason, and he was so concerned. I wanted to smack myself in the face.
"Its okay, Park." I replied, "I'll probably make pancakes or something. You go."
Parker kissed my forehead. "You call me if you want anything alright?"
I nodded. "I will."
"Take care Khlo," Parker murmured in my ear, hugging me before leaving. As I watched his retreating back, a million thoughts ran through my head.
Why didn't I fall in love with Parker? No matter how much of a manwhore he was, he was the most caring guy I've met. He took care of this one night stands if they fell sick. And he never gave any girl hope for more.
Two arms slid around my waist, and I quickly turned around, surprised. Ian stood in front me, in all his naked glory, making a blush spread across my cheeks.
"You should go." I said, not wanting to feel the embarrassment of feeling like a one night stand. I was done being his play toy. I was my own person. I couldn't let him in my life again. Not after I tried so hard to let him out.
"Excuse me?" Ian's voice held the surprise he probably felt.
"I'm going to go to go out." I said, thankful when my voice came out strong.
"Where?"
"To my friend's."
Ian narrowed his eyes at me. His hands tightened on my waist and all I could do was struggle out of his hold.
"What happened?" He asked, concern clear in his voice.
"You should go."
"Khloe."
"Go Ian." I muttered. Tears threatened to run down my face. I looked away, not wanting him to see my face.
"Khlo?"
"Go away!" I yelled, finally reaching my breaking point. "Why don't you just go? Make this less fûcking awkward? Or do you find some sadistic pleasure in making me feel like a one night stand?"
Ian frowned. "One night stand? What are you talking about?"
I couldn't believe it. He didn't even know what I was talking about. Just awesome. "Nothing. Please leave."
"Only because I don't want to upset you Khloe." Ian said. I have him a tight smile. He kissed my forehead, walking out of my bedroom . I watched his retreating back, a feeling of helplessness washing over me.
I was getting stuck into his web again. This was Ian we were talking about. He has a hold on me, which no one else would or could ever have. He knew me like the back of his hand. He knew just how I was.
Sobs wrecked my body. Leaving Ian once was death in itself. If I fell for him again, I would probably be damaged forever. I wiped my tears away, taking some clothes from the closet. I quickly got dressed in some jeans and a snug shirt. Pulling on converse, I took out my phone, calling the one person who I knew would help me.
Walking into the parking lot, I walked away from my car, walking to my bike instead. I put on the helmet, driving off.
Riding the bike had in a way become a sort of therapy for me. After what happened with me and Ian, I needed focus. I had to get my life back on track. And I had to find other means than drowning myself in the throes of alcohol.
I rode for almost an hour. A smile crossed my face as I remembered my first time riding. I almost fell off the bike, cursed Parker about a million times, before finally getting a hold of it.
I stopped in front of the café. The café that belonged to Marley's grandma. She had become a sort of parent figure for me over here. I could go to her for any problems whatsoever and she would always be there to help.
I walked into the café, inhaling the strong scent of coffee. I smiled at Fanny, Marley's grandma.
She walked to me, instantly enveloping me in a hug. Her all too familiar smell hit me, and I knew that I was going to make through this. There were some people who just gave off a vibe like that. And more often than not, this worked.
"Go sit down sweetie," Fanny said. "I'll get some cake and be right back."
I nodded, sitting on one of the tables in the far end. I took out my phone, looking for any messages. There were two from Marley and one from Ian.
Unconsciously, I opened Ian's message first.
**I don't know why you felt like an one night stand. You are my first and only love Khlo. Please call me once you're okay.- Ian.***
First and only love? Did he really mean that? Tears sprang in my eyes again. I wasn't over him.
"Ian!" An overly girly voice yelled and I turned around. A woman threw her arms around Ian's neck. My Ian.
He grinned at her, kissing her cheeks. He held out a seat for her, as she made a big deal of it, laughing airily. They liked cute together.
And, the worst part was that she seemed genuine. She didn't seem like once of those overly arrogant girls. She laughed brightly. And she smiled a lot.
"Khloe?" Fanny's voice brought me back. It was only when I looked at her that I realized that I heard tears in my eyes.
They would never change. My feelings for him.
But he already had someone.
*****
