Alex

I zipped my suitcase shut and took a step back from the bed to stare blankly at my luggage. Another project completed, another flight home. Jazmin wouldn’t be coming with me this time; our agreement had come to an end and now I was going to be travelling alone again until I found a woman to take her place.

I had thought about extending our agreement, to have her stay another year or even just a few months but I didn’t want to get attached and I could feel her getting restless. Some men liked this arrangement for a romantic relationship, I was open about the fact that I wanted it to stay strictly sexual. Jazmin wanted someone who wanted more and I respected that.

“Do you want Chloe’s number so you can text her yourself?”

I turned at the sound of Jazmin’s voice to see her leaning against the doorframe. Her hair was tied into a messy bun in a mix of bright purple and dark brown, and she was wearing her Philadelphia Fliers jersey. I was going to miss her; she was easy on the eyes and good company.

“No, I think it would be nicer if I ask her myself.” There was only one chance at a first impression, and I wanted to make the best one possible. “I have your money here…” I trailed off and pulled the envelope out of the pocket on my suitcase.

Jazmin took it gingerly and counted the bills while I watched, making sure she was satisfied. “Thanks, Alex.” She reached out for a hug and I pulled her close, the smell of oranges wafting around me. “If anything happens you know you can call me, okay? If Chloe doesn’t work out for you or anything else – just reach out.”

Just reach out. What an odd phrase. “I will,” I promised with a quick kiss to the top of her head. “I have to go, are you alright checking out on your own?”

She rolled her eyes as she pulled away and cast me a reassuring smile. “I’ll be fine, you need to get going so that you don’t miss your flight.”

“You’re right…” I sighed and grabbed my bag off the bed before heading for the door. “Next Friday, yes?”

“Friday, seven at Cistern’s. She’ll be the short blonde; you can’t miss her.”

“And she’s new?”

“She’s green.”

“How green?”

Jazmin groaned and pushed me towards the door. “Alex, go catch your flight.”

I sighed again and held up my hands in defeat. Jazmin laughed and led me out of the hotel room, being sure to kiss my cheek before nudging me towards the elevators. She was a sweet girl, and I knew that it disappointed her that I didn’t want anything romantic, but I hoped that she found what she wanted eventually.

I rode back to the airport in silence, reading emails off my phone with updates from my offices. My son Peter was needing help with the construction firm, he wasn’t used to managing his own team yet, others from the real estate side needed approval for several large acquisitions. And then there were several distinctly annoyed emails from Marie… I couldn’t deal with her right now. I didn’t even want to think about the divorce papers waiting for me on my desk.

Shaking my head, I leaned back in my seat, hit Zamir’s number and listened to it ring.

“Hej,” he greeted in a sleep thick voice. “What do you want?”

“I’m on my way home,” I told him absently. “How was Gianni?”

“A raging prick who can’t keep his hands to himself,” he snapped. “I warned him not to show up in Cannes, I don’t want him on my yacht.”

Zamir’s irritation combined with his thick Albanian accent made me feel more at ease despite being an ocean apart. “What did he do?”

“Acted like a twat to that pretty little Russian girl I had, she told me she doesn’t think our arrangement will work out. I told that asshole that he can’t come around my girls anymore.”

Gianni Fiori wasn’t good with women; I wasn’t surprised that Zamir didn’t want him around anymore. I was more surprised that it had taken this long for something to push my friend to his limits. I didn’t trust Gianni alone with my girls either; he was sleazy and rude and I didn’t want my company to think I tolerated that sort of behaviour.

“Are you still going to Cannes?” I asked suddenly. “I thought you called that off.”

“No, I am going, and you are welcome to join, but not him. Are you bringing a date?”

“Possibly. I have a new girl to meet first.”

He chuckled. “Ah, I get it. Well, if you want to come, bring her with you, but otherwise, I will have a fully stocked boat.”

Yacht girls. Not quite my thing, but I was still open to the premise. “I will let you know,” I told him. “Do you want my girl’s number? She’s looking for a new sugar daddy.”

“The purple haired one you brought around last time?”

“Yes.”

He thought on it for a minute. “Give her my number, tell her to call me if she’s interested.”

I snorted to myself and agreed to do that. Leave it to him to expect Jazmin to come to him instead of the other way around. I knew that would spark her interest.

Before I could say anything else, the car came to a slow stop under the canopy and I steeled myself to go back into hell.

“I have to go,” I told him reluctantly. “I’ll be in Athens tomorrow.”

“Call me when you get in, I’ll save you from the harpy.”

I laughed and we said goodbye just as I was getting out of the car. I wished I didn’t have to go back to the real world to face Marie and Peter, I wished I could still text Jazmin and tell her I changed my mind, but it was too late, I’d cut her loose.

Chloe will be the last one, I vowed silently, this will be the last time. I didn’t want to have to pay not to be lonely anymore, I needed to find my footing with this divorce.

***

Chloe

***

“You cannot meet him unless you promise me that you won’t go getting all attached,” Jazmin demanded as we strode up and down the aisles of Red London sex shop. “He’s not the dating type, he’s the fucking type and I don’t want you getting your hopes up.”

I grabbed a hand-shaped fisting toy and held it out to her. “He doesn’t just do handouts for the needy?”

She scoffed and snatched the toy from me. “You’re not needy, Clo, you’re lazy.”

I laughed and shoved my hands into my pockets. Jaz wasn’t wrong. “I just want to get paid for doing nothing. What are we doing here, does he expect me to show up in a full gimp suit?” I asked, eyeing the rack of leather accessories suspiciously.

Jaz snickered and grabbed a small pocket-sized vibrator. “No, I brought you here for lingerie and I also wanted to do some shopping for myself.”

Lingerie, hair, nails, and a nice outfit to get me started for this not-date. And a stroll through the sex shop to remind me that I had never in my life felt less prepared to have sex with someone. I hadn’t told Jazmin that part though, she thought I lost my v-card years ago and I wasn’t thrilled to tell her otherwise.

“We’re not gonna do this on the first night though…right?” I couldn’t jump into this with both feet on the first date, I needed some build up.

She shook her head and held up a negligee set that was completely sheer and covered in rhinestone. “This is cute,” she mused. “For me, not for you.”

I snorted and continued on through the racks without her. Alexander Hatzistefanis. Very Greek. Mama would approve.Not of his age but definitely of his background. And not that I would be introducing them, but it helped me feel that little bit safer about doing this knowing that would please her.

I stopped in front of a rack of white lingerie being advertised as bridal night wear. We weren’t dating, we certainly weren’t getting married, but at one point I had been convinced I would lose it on my wedding night. It would be cute to get it for myself, my own private virgin joke…

“White?” Jaz asked, making me jump.

“Yeah,” I replied sheepishly. “It’s pretty, I was thinking this one with the corset…”

The “corset” did up with several hooks down the front centre, the sides were structured boning that outlined the shape but didn’t have any actual fabric. The panties were similar but with a tan sheer material to make it look like there was nothing.

“That’s cute! Is that what you want?”

“I think so.” I held it up to myself, imagining it under a cute dress. “Do you think he would like it?”

“Buy it for you, not for him,” she advised. “Also, this isn’t the only place we can go, there’s a bunch of other stores we can check out.”

Buy it for me… I didn’t own anything like this, just a few mismatching bra and panty sets from Victoria’s Secret. I hung the lingerie off my arm and turned back to her determinedly. “I want this one.”

Jaz smirked, her bubble-gum pink lipstick drawing my gaze. “Alright, whatever you want.”

I grinned to myself and followed her to the register, noting the package of batteries she grabbed at the last second. Jaz paid in cash with neatly pressed bills that made my mouth feel dry. He paid her in cash, that was what she told me, and seeing her use it just made this feel more real. I stood like an idiot beside her, not even looking at the clerk, just feeling the way my stomach flipped again and again. A stranger was going to pay for me to be at his beck and call sexually and I would use that money anywhere I could…

She handed me the bag and steered us towards the doors, I stumbled along beside her, lost in the reality of everything hitting me at once. Still, I covertly stashed the black bag into my purse knowing full-well that if I came home with it in hand that Mama would ask about it.

“Okay, so!” Jazmin said, excitedly clapping her hands together as we made our way to her white Lexus convertible. “I’m taking you to get your hair done tomorrow but tonight I have mani-pedis booked. Do you want to come to the spa for waxing tomorrow too?”

Wax what? She better not mean a Brazilian, no way was I letting someone near that with a wax strip. “I don’t have to get a bikini wax or anything, right?”

Jaz laughed and beeped the keyfob. I slipped in beside her and ran my hand along the smooth, silky interior of the car, in awe that she could afford this. “No, Clo,” she said as the engine came to life. “You don’t have to wax anything you don’t want to. I will be getting a Brazilian, but if you just want to get your arms or legs done, then just let me know.”

I nodded and laid my head back against the seat as I watched her pull out into traffic. The soft top was down, and the wind whipped her multicoloured hair around wildly. Jazmin owned a luxury car, and she didn’t have to tell her parents when she was going out. She was almost finished college too, and she lived on her own. She had a level of freedom I could only dream of right now. I wanted her freedom, but I knew that I needed financial independence to do that. I needed to not be a wuss about this date.

Mani-pedis made me feel bolder, especially once the long gel nails were finished and I heard them click against the screen of my phone. White glitter on soft pink polish made me feel downright royal when I admired the handiwork from the tech. Jaz talked me out of the really long ones, warning me that I should work my way up so that I didn’t lose complete use of my hands while I got used to them. I heeded the warning since I already felt weird enough walking with a pedicure.

I wasn’t thrilled to have to go home though, as we pulled up through the cul-de-sac all I could think of was the inquisition waiting on the other side of the bright blue door.

“Don’t tell her everything, okay?” Jaz asked as we pulled into the driveway. “Just tell her that you’re going on a date, or like a double date with me and leave it at that.”

“I’ll try, but I can’t make any promises.” The curtain in the living room fluttered and I took a deep breath. “I’ll call you in the morning.”

“Alright, bye babe.”

I grabbed my purse and waved to her as I jogged up the driveway. She honked when she pulled away and I watched as her car disappeared back the way it came before pushing the door open. The scent of dinner carried from the kitchen, a stew of some sort, and Dimitris came bounding down the stairs toward me as soon as the door clicked shut.

“Clo!” he cried, barrelling straight into my open arms. “Did you get me anything?”

I scoffed and picked him up, cringing at his weight but still carting him off to the kitchen. “You get to see me, isn’t that enough?”

He blew me a raspberry and squirmed in my grasp, I dropped the five-year-old back on his feet and pointed him to the kitchen table. “Go set the table for mama.”

“I believe that’s your job,” mama remarked from her spot in front of the stove. “But here, you can bring this to the table and get cups down.”

Mama’s long hair wasn’t pulled into a braid or a ponytail today, instead, the golden locks were loose around her shoulders and made her look more like someone out in the country instead of a PTA mom that lived in suburbia.

I hung my jacket up and helped set up the table, Dima danced around us, excitedly talking about how dad was going to be home soon. He wouldn’t be home until after midnight, that was just how it happened most of the time, but it was cute to see Dima get so excited.

The three of us ate dinner together, my eyes kept darting to my bag, praying that Mama wouldn’t need anything out of it and discover my little outfit. While we ate, we made small talk about Dima’s schoolwork and where I had applied to recently, but I waited until my brother was done his dinner before actually trying to broach the subject of the date.

“So,” I began, slowly picking at my plate. “I have a date this weekend.”

Mama froze and glanced over at me with wide eyes. “You do?”

I nodded. “It’s a double date with Jazmin and her boyfriend,” I explained quickly. “But yeah, we’re going to some restaurant.”

“Have I met him?”

“I haven’t even met him. It’s a blind date, mama.”

She tsked and got up to put away the water jug. “Blind dates can be dangerous; I just want to know that you’re being safe.”

“I know.” I was almost nineteen, she had to start cutting me some slack. “But, um, do you think you could make me a doctor’s appointment?”

“Why do you need a doc-er?” Dimitris asked from across the table, stumbling over his words. “Are you sick?”

My face felt hot, but I pretended not to notice as I stared down at my plate in silence.

“Dima, if you’re done with your dinner then you can put your plate in the sink and go get ready for your bath,” mama suggested.

He complained, whining loudly but Mama wasn’t swayed by his pouting. She had him clean his spot and sent him upstairs before pulling up the chair beside me folding her hands into her lap.

“Chloe,” she said quietly. “You know you can always talk to me, koritsi mou.”

I nodded. “I know, I just… I think it’s a good idea to talk to Dr. Neilson.”

“After you’ve met this boy, right?” she pressed. “This isn’t urgent, is it?”

“No, I—” I broke off sharply and grabbed my glass off the table. Fuck this was incredibly awkward. “It’s not urgent, I just think that I should talk to her about the pill…” My voice shook, it was strained, and I felt like a complete idiot having this conversation.

“Would you tell me if you had sex?”

I wanted the chair to dissolve under me and then just let me be absorbed into the void. Why was this so fucking painful to talk about out loud? “Yeah,” I said finally.

“Have you?” she asked more forcefully.

I met her gaze slowly, forcing myself to shake my head and not look like a deer in headlights. I hadn’t, not with an actual person, but I had toys stashed away in my drawers upstairs. I’d fooled around with a few ex-boyfriends, but I’d never successfully gone that far.

She reached out for a hug and despite my embarrassment I hugged her back tightly, revelling in her embrace. We’d had this conversation so many times, after changing high schools twice and years of bullying and nasty rumours, it was foreign to have someone actually ask me that question and not make assumptions.

“Don’t be afraid to talk to me,” she whispered. “About anything that happens.”

“I will,” I promised hoarsely. “You won’t be mad at me?”

“Not at all, koritsi mou.”

We stayed like that for a moment and only broke apart once Dima’s yelling upstairs became too loud to ignore. She sighed and got up while running a hand through her loose hair.

“Remember that birth control fails,” she said tiredly. “Use condoms as well so that you don’t end up with a blessed accident.”

“You told me he was planned!”

“He was as planned as you were,” she teased with a wink.

“Ew…”

Mama’s laughter could be heard as she moved through the house, I listened to her climb the stairs and chase my little brother into the bathroom for his bath before bed.

I wouldn’t tell her that the guy I was meeting up with was her age and probably had a kid or two of his own already, but I would definitely take that “unplanned pregnancy” warning to heart. Plan B seemed like a good investment.