Chapter 2
I pulled a bottle of chilled wine from the cooler as my hand settled the delicate drinking glass to the granite. It clinked against it, almost falling, but I caught it. Rolling my eyes, I placed the wine bottle beside it. Four hours of sleep hadn’t been enough, I felt like I needed a whole week.
My fingers left the items and I leaned into the counter tops, taking a moment to recoup as vertigo invaded.
Groaning and moaning didn’t help cure me, but it helped irk me. My eyes fluttered open to gaze over the alcohol choice, I thought of Beth at that moment and what she’d stupidly suggested to me earlier. She was always a bit dramatic, but something about her words had bothered me and for that reason, I picked up the bottle of wine and put it back in the cooler.
I’m not pregnant.
I couldn’t be.
I stared at the bottles and bottles of alcohol, twitching—I looked like an alcoholic, but that was okay because I was not pregnant. Turning in a fit of agitation, I slammed my palm on the counter.
“Ow!” I clutched my thumb where I’d bent it back in my rage. “What the heck is the matter with me?” My hand started to swell, my eyes following with tears.
I was so happy I was not at work. Doug wouldn’t have known what to do with me, perhaps he would have even fired me.
No, he wouldn’t do that.
I doubted myself for a split second and then left my apartment in a hurry, on a mission to prove Elizabeth wrong.
I took off with my purse and coat, jogging out into the hallway, impatient for the elevator and, even more, impatient for the arrival of where I was going. Playing with the keys in my hand until I was down in the main lobby, I dashed outside to the sidewalk before anyone or anything could disrupt me.
Even though I felt like I may hurl at any moment, I was quick down the few blocks. Finally, getting to the pharmacy, I burst through the sliding doors. It was silently deafening as the droning oldies music played in the background.
I glanced at each of the isles as I walked, finding the one that I needed. Hesitating at the top of it, trying to decide if walking forward would send me to the mental ward. I took a nervous step, bombarded with an array of condoms, mocking me like a bunch of cocky—
I shook my thoughts and snatched the nearest and likely most expensive pregnancy test as I practically ran to the checkout. Where grabbing a pack of gum and a random celebrity magazine made sense in my task to hide my actual purchase.
The woman in front of me talked to the cashier like I didn’t exist behind her waiting. I was about to snap when finally she finished and took her one little bag of nothing.
I threw the items by the cashier and fumbled to pull out my wallet.
The scan of beeps was followed by the woman’s voice snapping me out of my not wanting to look up. “Twenty-five seventeen.”
I gave her my credit card and she swiped it through the machine.
“How are you?” She smiled at me.
I hated small talk.
“Fine, thanks.” Lies, I was buying a freaking pregnancy test in a fit of rage against my friend. I was so far from ‘fine.’
I snapped up the bag as the receipt flooded the machine.
She handed it to me and I left the store as quickly as I had come. Walking down the sidewalk only wracked me with more anxiety and as I returned my building, I started to think. It seemed whenever I thought about anything other than work, I ended up in a serious emotional state.
My fingers clutched the small white shopping bag as the elevator ascended, sending my thoughts into a catastrophic downward spiral. I could have been thinking of many other things, but instead, I repeated my euphoric Christmas with a stranger who had never actually felt like a stranger to me.
The elevator opened on my floor and I ran to my apartment, my body trembling from the mere idea of being pregnant with his child.
You don’t spend a few days with someone and get knocked up! You just don’t! Not to mention to the birth control, that doctor was getting sued if—
I stopped just inside the door of my apartment and stared at the shiny wood floors, there was nothing soothing about my sparse home. It only made me more aware of how alone I was.
I let out an annoyed scream and walked to my bedroom, securing myself in the confines and sinking into my bed, tired, annoyed and emotionally unstable.
~~~
The buzzing persisted.
I scratched my neck and stayed in my sweet dream, it was nice, warm, moan-able . . .
BUZZZZ.
“Ah!” I sat up and stared across the dark bedroom. I wrinkled my nose as I realized the sun had long since set. “Shit!” I scurried out bed as another call came over the intercom.
“Hello?” I snapped into the wall machine.
“That took you forever!” Elizabeth exclaimed.
“I was asleep.”
“Well, let me up, sicko. I brought you food.”
My mouth watered, I hadn’t eaten anything since breakfast and all of sudden, hunger rained down on me.
I buzzed her in and waited, my eyes falling on the counter after a long minute and onto the white plastic pharmacy bag.
“Ah!” I ran at it and grabbed it, shoving it in the cupboard and slamming it shut right as Elizabeth banged on the door.
I walked to it, getting myself back together and unlocking it in the process.
My preppy, bright-eyed friend, smiled at me, “Soup!” She slipped inside and I closed the door, locking it.
“How ya’ feeling?” she chirped, dismantling the take-out food.
“I’m exhausted still.”
“Have you been sleeping the whole time?” she asked, taking in my appearance.
“Yeah,” I admitted, leaving out my trip to the drug store.
“Alright, well, this should help you feel better, go sit down and I’ll dish it all up.”
I walked into my living room, finding a throw and covering myself in it. “How was work?”
“I’m not going to talk about work, Amy,” she chimed.
I groaned, it was the only thing that made me happy and she was totally going to deprive me.
I heard the cupboard doors open and then the clinking of plates and then—
“What’s this!” Elizabeth screeched.
My eyes flew open as I realized what she’d found and I rushed to the kitchen. “Nothing!”
“Oh, my!” Her mouth gaped. “Are you actually pregnant?”
I wanted to cry and I wasn’t sure why. “I haven’t done it.”
“Why did you buy it then!”
“You made me freak out!” I pointed at her because it was all her fault.
She took it from the plastic bag and examined the unopened box. “You’re not going to take it?”
I shrugged, not saying anything. I didn’t want to say anything, there was nothing to say.
“You should take it.”
I snatched it out of her hands. “This is your fault! You brought this up.”
“Well, Amy, come on. You have all these weird symptoms and you tried to eat greasy pizza earlier today.”
In my frustration, I tore apart the packaging and pulled out the unholy stick that fit perfectly between my two fingers. “I’m going to prove you wrong!” My feet thundered against the floors. “Get me some soup!” I shouted from the washroom and slammed the door.
My hands shook as I struggled to pull my pants free of my body. I couldn’t tell if I was nervous, upset or just going insane, either way, once I peed on the stick—I was pretty sure I had been knocked into the ‘insane’ category.
I slapped it down on the counters and waited, it moved across the display as it processed its order.
Then it decided.
One. Two . . .
I stared at the two lines that appeared, but I didn’t know what that meant, but two must have meant NO. I mean, I was pretty sure it was supposed to change colors and scream you’re pregnant!
I moved out of the bathroom satisfied, rubbing my hands together with triumph.
Elizabeth stared at me in wonderment.
I pulled the bowl of hot chicken noodle towards me and took a bite, happy as I filled my grumbling stomach.
“So?” she said after another few moments.
I glanced at her. “I told you, two lines. No.”
She picked up the box and turned to the instructions.
“This was all a big waste of—”
“Amy,” she exclaimed, “Two lines means yes!”
My spoon fell from my hand to the granite and then after feeling like time had frozen over, I screamed.
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